Dear Sabrina - A lifestyle blog for the thinking woman (and man)

A Life-Changing Way to Create Community

May 30, 2019 By Jodi

Years ago, when I was in the midst of an impromptu solo road trip around the West Coast, I was Couchsurfing (that's a real thing!) in Vancouver, B.C. at the home of a wonderful man called Simon. Simon is a life coach and a magnificent person, and he had this knack for flipping my world upside-down in every conversation.

One night we were having dinner in his loft, and I was telling him about my upcoming flight to Puerto Rico and the generous friend, Rich, who had offered to take me to the Seattle airport at 5am a week hence. I was saying that I felt a bit guilty asking this person to get up so early and drive so far, even if he had volunteered to do so.

Simon stopped me and asked, "Jodi, how do you feel when you help someone?" I felt good, I answered. It's always nice to help. It feels great when you can do something for someone that they really appreciate

"So why would you deny someone else the opportunity to feel good?"

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The Surprising Uses of Melancholy: Watercolor Painting and Reading Poetry

April 9, 2019 By Jodi

I may have mentioned that I went through a spate of melancholy recently. 😉 The good news it that I'm through it; the better news is that I got a lot out of it.

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Adult Supervision (not) Required

March 8, 2019 By Sonia Ruyts

When my first child was born, I was deep into baby care books, sleep solution books, and parenting books. I needed help, and I would read just about anything to get it.

Those early months were tough; I didn't have a circle of experienced women and babies around me to help navigate the ups and downs. So I turned to the experts for their guidance. Soon I was able to mete through all the opinions and recommendations and tune into my own parental intuition. By the time my second child was born, the books were gone and I was feeling pretty confident.

Of course, that's when things changed again, as they always do when parenting.

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How to Tell Who's Writing

March 7, 2019 By Jodi

Sonia's next post is coming soon, and we want to make sure you can tell who's writing. If you haven't noticed already, just under the title of each post is some identifying information: when the post was published, and who wrote it.

You can probably tell by the difference in our writing voices, but if you can't, just scroll to the top of any post to see who the author is.

Hope this helps - enjoy reading!

The Subtle Art of Showing You Give a F@ck

March 3, 2019 By Jodi

James and I are taking a parenting class offered by August's school. The class is called Parenting with Love and Logic (the link goes to a book by the same name). The basic idea is to use empathy with our children in order to empower them to handle their own problems and decisions.

One of the keys is that the empathy has to be genuine, and that children have to feel that they are wholly loved and supported by their parents (and caregivers). One small way of doing this is making every hello and goodbye an event, to take a moment to look our kids in the eyes during these greetings. The Love and Logic way suggests another subtle, profound way to connect with our kids, too, that I've started doing.

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How Much Alone Time Do You Need?

February 22, 2019 By Jodi

Last weekend I traveled without my family for the first time. While James has traveled for work regularly throughout our married life, ever since having kids I have been the one to stay put and hold down the fort. Also, I've had a nursing baby for most of the last seven years, so it has been impractical, if not impossible, for me to leave.

But when we started going over the details of having the whole family travel to Wisconsin for a family event, we realized it was going to be a not insignificant burden to get us all comfortably accommodated in the Midwest for 3-4 days, so James suggested I go alone. I protested at first, not even understanding the concept. But the more I thought about it, the more sense it made—and then I booked plane tickets in record time. =)

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Show Me Your Mess

February 11, 2019 8 Comments

Recently, I broke a nail while trying to clean up before a friend arrived for a play date. It was a snag that cut deep into the quick and was painful enough to stop me in my tracks. While I was nursing my wound, I had the clarity of mind to ask myself: why are...

Introducing Sonia!

February 11, 2019 Leave a Comment

I have exciting news to share: I'm bringing a new, regular contributor on board here at Dear Sabrina! Sonia and I met when our kids were at the same preschool, and I instantly admired her style, thoughtfulness, humor, and the community she had created as a local business owner in our small town. After many...

Some Categories of Anger (and Melancholy, of Course)

February 8, 2019 Leave a Comment

What's your Achilles' heel? Mine is definitely anger. I get angry a lot. (I have a lot of other shortcomings, but that's the one that dominates.) I get angry irrationally and I get angry for totally appropriate reasons (though my husband and children might disagree). So I was immediately intrigued when I came across this...

Getting back into it

February 1, 2019 6 Comments

I'll spare you the apologies and excuses. It's been a long time since I posted, and I've wondered over the past few months whether I will keep this up—whether I want to keep this up. Theoretically I do, practically I don't know if I can manage. Which kinda sounds like a lot of things in...